Humorist Of Holy Tales Pillows

Adam and Eve: If not satisfied with products for any reason, please expel them from paradise.

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

"We only got six days of funding."

"Guess who brought king cake!"

Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!

Moses separating his Laundry.

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

Night-time halo

"Well, we needed the rain."

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

"Surgery up here is free!"

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

Devil's food cake/Angel's food cake. Delivery mix-up.

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

"All we have left is standing room only."

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

The Adventures of God

A surprise in heaven

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

'We've re-branded.'

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'On second thought, let's try it the other way around... My head on a lion's body.'

'No, smart guy -- it means all of them at once!'