Humor Monarch Pillows

'How about a game of cards?'

"Surprise!"

'How about a game of cards?'

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

"It's time to get politics out of money."

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

"Is this the same gold bar I gave you last year?"

'No, you can't play poker tonight! The last time you played, you lost Schewig-Holstein!'

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

"Don't worry, princess, I'm sure one day your Mr. Divine Right will come along."

"I have to admit. You talked a good game."

''Depression'? -- You or the country or both?'

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

"It's either this or a country run by lawyers."

King completes rubik's cube.

'You can scratch your back when the war is over!'

'He just outlawed his in-laws.'

'Could you scoot your chair over this way a little dear?'

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"

'This is great! -- I should have thought of tax simplification years ago!'

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

'I know it seems like a war, but it's actually an all-out struggle for peace!'

'I wish you wouldn't bring work home with you!'

"The kids - Prince Englebert and Princess Felicia - would like us to move into the olde monarchs' home."

"Friend or foe?"

"King and clown—why can't I be both?"

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"Why, this is fit for me!"

'Well, you DID know this job was dangerous when you took it.'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'