Humor Hobbyist Gifts

"There, but for the grace of Cod..."

"Thanks for letting me borrow the car, Dad. And would you mind speaking with the police outside?"

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Police Feline Unit

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

Selling lemon latt�

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Faster, Georges, faster!

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

Cariactures

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Do Not Resuscitate

Speed Dating for Turtles