Humanity Gifts

Intelligent beings from outer space.

"Impress people with your generosity"

'Wait till your father gets a home.'

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

Now showing, at a University near you...

"So what makes you think you're qualified for this job?"

Non-Denominational Carols

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

Creator's Remorse

Michel de Montaigne

"It's thrilling to watch them come out in the morning, ready for the kill!"

Human History

"In my first creation I made man introspective, peaceful and considerate. It was sooo boring."

"Numerous complaints have led school officials to investigate this popular teacher for encouraging students to pursue degrees in the humanities."

"I don't have anything against you in particular. My disdain encompasses humanity as a whole."

"He's standing upright and using a mobile phone. I think our evolution has begun."

'Yeah, I agree: It's hard to impress females by looking virile and strong when you're all pink...'

English major will work for food.

Inspired

"Times like these bring out the best in us."

"Artificial intelligence has just identified humanity's main problem. It's human."

"You'd think a Humanities professor would be more lenient in her grading."

"Being a post-doc for thirty years can really screw up your life."

'Tell me. Did the 253 internships come before or after the Ph.D in English?'

Atheism inc. - A Not-For-Prophet Organisation

'Society doesn't see me. They don't care. It's like I'm invisible.'

'Misanthropology.'

'At this point, I'm taking it one paradigm at a time.'

Humanities Department

"Sorry—I live in a parallel universe."

"Do you need art and culture?"

Think for yourself...

'They're only seeking attention.'

People people and the people behind them.

"I just discovered something very interesting. Go down to the river...and you'll see it."