Human Cannonball Gifts

"I put in a full day with the big cats, Kasmer. I need a sympathetic human cannonball I can come home to."

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

The Perfect Cannonball

"FORE!"

"You know damn well what noise!"

'Your father and I support your career aspirations, but we feel you need a new practice space.'

Tank driver wielding a slingshot.

"No bouquet toss for this bride. She's shooting it out of a cannon."

'WOW! Did anyone see the recoil on this baby?'

"It's just a little device I use to help relieve the anxiety from meeting new people."

"Try not to loft the ball so much.'

'Yo! No cannonballs!'

Next time I get to choose the weapon first.

'Since your offense was only a misdemeanor, our firing squad will pummel you with water balloons instead.'

The Origin of Life

"You must be the cannon cleaner."

"What's it going to take to put you in one of these babies?"

Hitting a Brick Wall.

"Another miss, sir."

Light Artillery

Battle.

'Closer... closer...'

'The neighbors don't care how you commute, but they're beginning to complain about the noise.'

'Say hello to your mother...'

Yomp' career cut short by beanball!

"I see Daddy's back from the gun show."

Mr. Popularity.

The devil relaxing at home

Early starter gun development

"It's been quite the conversation piece. . . or not."

If you're going to scream every time a kid yells cannonball, you're not coming with me anymore.

Oh, they haven't really been bad enough for lightning bolts … Just bring me some water balloons.

Normally, Ruby's timing was excellent.

'Yes, the cannon is loaded, and yes, I would like seconds.'

Diving Cannon