Human Behavior Gifts

The Map of the Human Heart

Psychometric tests would weed out 25% of all applicants (medical schools).

Body Language...

'We haven't got much time left together.'

"So. Mr Smith, what makes you think you are too controlling?"

"'I don't care if you are an eighty-year-old billionaire' I said. 'I love you for who you are'."

Sigmund Freud

Panhandler with sign; "Too honest about my true feelings."

'I don't have to take guff from anyone. I'm the doctor! Go out there stand up to her...'

People I've Met At Parties Whose Names I've Forgotten

Enthusiasm Making love & Waging war

Second-hand Slander and Innuendo £10

Fellow Man

Specialising in Multiple Personality Disorder

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

I'm not good with names but never forget a face. Of course, that's not very useful right now.

'Unlike a lot of bosses, ours isn't shy about admitting when he's wrong. And THAT's the problem!'

Statue of Men Hugging

"Bet they fail!"

Do not look up!

Hugs.

'J.B. has never expressed his anger violently, but I've never seen him THIS angry before!'

'At some point this evening I'll probably say something highly insulting. Obnoxiousness is part of my genetic make up.'

Well, I told you she fancied me!

'They say that those who most disturb us are our most powerful teachers...'

The institute.

"Freud said love and work are the cornerstones of our humanness, but human mess is equally true."

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

Police Feline Unit

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"Why do they do that?"

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."