Housing Market Critics Gifts

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

Three little pigs-mortgage.

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'He's a blight on the whole neighbourhood.'

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

'It seems good, and he said the bit at the bottom is the name of the architect.'

'We could easily share this nest: You would use it during the day and I would use it at night...'

"For sale £470,000 house included"

'One might say the market's gone from the sub-prime to the iniquitous!'

Battery Farm Housing

'Being afraid to buy a house doesn't make you homeophobic.'

It's a nice apartment but I don't want to pay my share of the national debt for rent.

"No, I do not live in my parents basement...it's a walk out."

Affordable housing

'That's the Government for you every time.'

'Hi, this is Wilbur Gurkenman, your real estate agent! I've found a single room apartment I think you can afford...'

'Problems finding good, affordable housing?'

'Here's a nice one, 'The Oaks', but where are the oaks?'

'Mr. Jones? I've found a house that fits your funds perfectly! It even has a little garden!'

'My mortgage is underwater.'

"Considering the rental market, this property offers a fantastic view, and they'll drop the restrictions."

"We're going to use the 6.4 million pounds to purchase a terraced in a run down area of Huddersfield."

Housing bubble

"Their entire friendship is based on regret over property they SHOULD have bought when it was affordable."

Foreclosure.

'I don't think you have quite grasped the principal behind sheltered housing.'

Affordable homes coming soon - 'If they build these then our house will become affordable...!'

"I think we have mice in the walls."

"No, it is right. The whole property market's going down the pan."

'I hope buying this house won't sink us.'

'Trust Me, I am an Estate Agent.'

"It's the artist's impression of our proposed new housing development."