Household Hacker Pillows

"He's starting to make coffee in the mailbox, isn't he?"

"Never marry an engineer."

"Anytime Ed gets too cocky, I tell him to go try and fold a fitted bed sheet."

'I accidentally hacked into Mom's microwave oven.'

Changing the Lightbulb.

Weird things I do because of the internet

Gadget geek.

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

Instant Laundry Detergent, 'Just add water'.

Giving Things Up For Lent.

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

"Not tonight, Jon. I have to clean for the cleaning lady."

Wallpapering with Nails

'Where you went wrong' Desk.

"I hacked into Santa's computer and added a few gifts. It pays to have computer skills."

"Go ahead. Click on 'I Am Not A Robot.' I dare you."

'Life if so much simpler since we called Family Ref.'

'Now, now...no stealing people's data until you finish your brussels sprouts.'

'I think Benjamin like me. He linked my homepage to his homepage.'

Whack-A-Chore: "You play it all day, every day, until you can't anymore."

'What do you mean that you hacked into Old Faithful's computer so now it's not so faithful?'

"The toaster is broken again, sweetheart."

'Done! We're now on Santa's 'nice' list.'

"Sure I remember you. I'm terrible with faces but I never forget a username, pin or password."

"I just installed a home security monitor."

'My ambition is to discover the Great American Loophole.'

"He downloaded one of those apps that helps you quit smoking."

STRIP Hambone: "System been down long?"

Secrets of Adulthood.

"I'm going to put some shelves up, certain scenes may contain strong language."

Cordless Drill and Drill Less Cords.

"Well, last year I kicked gambling. . . the odds are 3 to 1 the New Year will be a good one."

'Geek computer hackers wouldn't have survived a week at MY West Point!'

'We had a power surge, and the electronic scoreboard seems to have tapped into the CIA's computer.'

'Don't ask questions, Margaret -- Just get Bill Gates on the phone!'