Smart Home Hacker Pillows

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"I have an imaginary friend called Fred, and my dad has one called Alexa."

"No, our home wasn't stolen. Since it's a 'smart home', it keeps having itself moved to a nice neighborhood."

Gadget geek.

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

"Alexa, play Thriller by Michael Jackson."

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

1 Only Smart Hammer Instructions

"Larry, what's the weather forecast?" "Let me ask you something. Did you make waffles this morning? Because someone had maple syrup on their hands, and I seem to recall a hand moving me... a pretty, pretty, pretty sticky hand..."

Well, you and I know it's our home, but our 'smart home' doesn't know it's our home

"That thermostat I bought is smart. It knows how cheap I am, so it keeps our home freezing."

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

Wallpapering with Nails

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

'I accidentally hacked into Mom's microwave oven.'

"Never marry an engineer."

"A watched kettle never boils, so I'm covering up Alexa."

"I synchronized the complete household with the computer and the smartphone. Now I don't have to feel lonely when nobody is at home because I can talk to the loo."

'Good grief! Our house is so 'smart' it just refinanced itself!'

"The toaster is broken again, sweetheart."

"These are smart socks. They will crawl themselves to the clothes hamper when you throw them on the floor. Make sure they're charged before wearing them."

"Officer, someone hacked my bluetooth pressure cooker and blew my kitchen apart! What can I do?"

'Say - according to our home computer, we're out of bread.'

"Question ... what is my motivation to ever leave this armchair?"

"I just installed a home security monitor."

"I'm all for the internet of things - but I hate pop-up ads."

Changing the Lightbulb.

"No, it's not a computer monitor. It's a doggy door. Not everything is technology related."

"This home doesn't have a good view, but it comes with smart windows that change the view to something beautiful."

"How do you like our new smart water hose? It knows when you're dirty and hoses you off before you come into the house."

"Hold it, Harry. There's a new software update for our toothbrushes."

"Good morning, Doug, I've had a chat with the other smart appliances, and we feel we'll be just fine without you from here on in."