Household Chore Wrangler Gifts

"Well, it will just have to wait."

Kitchen Tetris

Washing Line Walker

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

"Can you train him to bite my husband whenever the trash gets full?"

"Sorry Mrs. Tate. There's no cure for Not-Taking-Out-The-Garbage-Itis."

'It's your night to catch dinner.'

"Just empty it."

"You used the right amount of detergent and fabric softener. The problem is this washing machine isn't for dishes."

'I did my part of house cleaning, now it's your time...it's shovel ready'

"What is that creepy sound?" "Don't worry. It's just the ghost of the old dishwasher."

'Mr. big shot scientist who works 18 hours a day at a prestigious lab developing high strength corrosion inhibitors, but can I get him to spend 2 minutes getting rust stains out of our own tub? No.'

"That goes to the dry cleaners."

'Who's the clown responsible for ordering the new exercise equipment?'

You mean none of you took out the trash? Why you rarely see a female polygamist.

'Mom, how old was I when Dad first hired you to do all this stuff around the house?'

"I knew it would be a silly idea to ask him to hang the washing out for me,"

'When he said he wanted to put me on a pedestal, it was only so I could dust the ceiling fan!'

Nate Sure Abhors a Vacuum!

'As the CEO of a large corporation, I don't suppose you'd consider taking out the garbage?'

No caption. (A woman folding laundry from the dryer is looking at a mouse folding laundry from a mousehole on the side of the dryer).

'Well, dear, I did tell you to stay out of my way when I'm vacuuming!'

Professional Dishwasher Loading Championship

'Yes it's a conspiracy theory, he's never ever done the washing up.'

Tunnel of Laundry.

'I'll see your 'Washing the Dishes' and raise you 'Two Loads of Laundry''

'You put the kettle on and I'll re-arrange the furniture!'

'What's your washing dishes got to do with human rights?'

'Washing dishes, why?'

"Are you using the right size nail for mother's picture?"

"Laundry day?"

The Toilet paper roll...do they magically appear on the holders?

'That Riding Vacuum has given our marriage a spark I didn't think was possible.'