Household Chore Wrangler Gifts

"Well, it will just have to wait."

Kitchen Tetris

Washing Line Walker

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

"Sorry Mrs. Tate. There's no cure for Not-Taking-Out-The-Garbage-Itis."

'It's your night to catch dinner.'

"Just empty it."

'Mr. big shot scientist who works 18 hours a day at a prestigious lab developing high strength corrosion inhibitors, but can I get him to spend 2 minutes getting rust stains out of our own tub? No.'

'I did my part of house cleaning, now it's your time...it's shovel ready'

"That goes to the dry cleaners."

"What is that creepy sound?" "Don't worry. It's just the ghost of the old dishwasher."

'Who's the clown responsible for ordering the new exercise equipment?'

'As the CEO of a large corporation, I don't suppose you'd consider taking out the garbage?'

"I knew it would be a silly idea to ask him to hang the washing out for me,"

Nate Sure Abhors a Vacuum!

'Mom, how old was I when Dad first hired you to do all this stuff around the house?'

'When he said he wanted to put me on a pedestal, it was only so I could dust the ceiling fan!'

'Well, dear, I did tell you to stay out of my way when I'm vacuuming!'

'I'll see your 'Washing the Dishes' and raise you 'Two Loads of Laundry''

'Yes it's a conspiracy theory, he's never ever done the washing up.'

'You put the kettle on and I'll re-arrange the furniture!'

Professional Dishwasher Loading Championship

Tunnel of Laundry.

'What's your washing dishes got to do with human rights?'

'Washing dishes, why?'

"Are you using the right size nail for mother's picture?"

"Laundry day?"

The Toilet paper roll...do they magically appear on the holders?

Presents.

'That Riding Vacuum has given our marriage a spark I didn't think was possible.'