House Design Gifts

'The contractor didn't do windows.'

'I understand they're in the fast-food business.'

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

"I always thought of my childhood home as being larger."

'The kids just love doing paint by numbers.'

"We get fantastic indoor facilities during the cold months."

"All your throw pillows were in knots."

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

'I think I've finally found a fixer-upper in your price range.'

"Yup, looks like your bookcase is full. You might want to start thinking about getting a new one."

You dope! Why would you build our home right next to a power plant?

"Can't we just get some load-bearing wallpaper?"

Spring Cleaning

Before he was taken away, Dr. Stuart Trust was the last known doctor to make HOUSE CALLS.

'It's a self-build.'

'No, we did not order a corner unit.'

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

"We've completely child-proofed our home."

"Hmmm. Not sure it will go with my wife."

twist building

'It's a new concept, the inside out house.'

Planning permission REFUSED...

Eggshell blue

Swiss Army Stove.

"Did we just paint the house or did it just paint us?!"

"As far as form following function, it's a brilliant design for a business center."

Access Assessments

Buider, "How crazy do you want this paving, mad,or completely wacko?"

Skeleton Builder.

"To be honest, we were thinking of something like a Cape Cod."

Smaller shoe being built onto a shoe house.

Builder follows an architect's blueprints exactly, including the smudges.

"I'm getting a little itchy to redo the bedroom!"

'...and the property comes with a fully fitted kitchen'