Hotel Humor Appreciator Pillows

Graffiti on baseboard.

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'He's not a pet. He's an endangered species.'

"Scientists may need a trillion dollar atom smasher to explore the fundamental questions of the universe, but all you need is one too many."

Limerick Airport

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

'Yep, another set of incisors that are too sharp for security regulations. You'll need to wear a muzzle during the flight, ma'am.'

"Just think of all the cigarettes I could have smoked."

Hospital gown pageant.

"Sorry for the wait - I hope it wasn't too long."

"I see you didn't purchase ANY leg room"

'Would you like a room on the sunny side, sir? Haha, just kidding!'

'I see the Maids have been in!'

'...Do you have an appointment...?'

'Who gets the penile implant, him or me?'

Bed or breakfast.

'Hello, Room Service?'

'Hey doctor, how come I'm totally alone in this section?'

ER, The Musical: 'I'm a medic...' 'n' I'm a medic...' 'They're a paramedics!'

No petting in the pool!

"Here’s your room key and mini-bar."

Spock visits the Orthopedics

'Well? How was the flight?'

'This get well card is from the nurses you have been complaining about.'

"We find it calms the patient."

"Do you have a room for a couple of knights?"

"Apparently our hotel is just a stone's throw from the beach..!"

But the brochures says breakfast in bed! Yes, only if you carry your bed down to the dining room!

'Service Lift.'

'Don't worry about it, nurse. Mr. Jones is one of my private patients.'

"Next time you ask the maid for extra towels, be sure to tip her."

The management consultants recommended the use of more portable technology on the wards...but we couldn't afford laptops.'

A Day at the Comics Bar

"Leave him alone. He's doing a great job!"

Free jukebox...