Hot Dog Connoisseur Gifts

All of my hopes and dreams, crushed, served on a bun.

DNA tested and yet my contents are still a mystery.

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

Canine obidience class: 'He wouldn't budge from the armchair.'

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

Artisan hot dog stand has pigs tethered to it.

How The Sausage Is Eaten

Back in 5 minutes!

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

'Another blond hair! You've been making a lot of night calls lately...'

Two men toting a dog in a carriage by foot, while the dog sticks his head out the window.

'Try the steak tartare...it's okay.'

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

"If man is my best friend, why is he giving me this crap to eat?"

"What's all this?"

"Make me one with everything!"

Hot Dog Animals: $2

Dog Park Zoom

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

Oh no ... Outsourcing

'I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid that's inappropriate.'

'We've conducted a chemical analysis of the beef in hot dogs, and we've determined, Mr Ruth, you are guilty of steroid enhancement.'

'Have you tried out new Labrador Retriever Butt Scent?'

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

A skinny dog drawn with zen brush.

"Watch his feet - if he doesn't step into the throw, he's going to fake it."

Dog Sees Only Food