Hospitality Heroes Pillows

"I'm Todd, your waiter, and I'd like you to think our friendship is more than contextual."

"Could I possibly get a bigger room?" (man bent over backwards).

"I'm finishing my shift now. But, if there's anything else you need, here's my home telephone number."

Waiting staff

'I sent out for everything.'

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

Ice Cream Surgeon

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

The born comedian - 'I'm only two days old and already I'm using great one liners!'

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

Cardiac Recovery.

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Courtyard of the Hotel de France, Montreuil.

'It's no problem, Mom. Samantha just likes to check on my table manners.'

As a rule, all surprise parties start out with good intentions.

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

"Valet park only"

Excuse me.. Are you Dog Friendly?

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

'Couldn't you think of anything to say to Herb and Mary? They were nice enough to invite us over.'

"Tracy Island offers palatial splendour in the safest of environments. Your beds are unmade because this is Tracy Emin Island."

Opening the Barrel

'I told you not to complain about the hospital food!'

'They're being damn noisy in the hospitality box next door,'

"So, you want me to go all the way back to the kitchen just to get you a menu...? Couldn't I just give you a link to our, online menu?!"

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

'Would you folks like sparkling water or tap water?'

Complementary Beverages

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

'It feels warm enough to me.'

Man Trying to Uncork Champagne.