Horticulturalist Gifts

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

"I'm afraid there's nothing we can do - you've got Japanese Topknotweed."

HELL'S TILLERS.

Planting Dreams.

"One man's apocalypse is another man's mandate."

"My Chilean monkey flower is just sitting there doing nothing."

Luther Burbank

Botanical Puns

A man loves gardening.

Little Dutch boy tends tulip plant

Manure as Fertilizer and other Tales of Derring-Doo.

'Snails do a good job of fertilizing the soil, but they're so slow about it.'

The dog wouldn't stand still

"Who wants to live in a Garden Centre?"

Ovalifolium Longifora

'We're in luck - we've discovered a new species!'

"I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong."

"You, my tenacious weed, are trespassing!"

Prize vegetables.

The Busy Gardener

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

Gardener attacked by plants.

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

Doing the borders.

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

Gardener

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

Plants Cheer as They Get Watered.

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."