Honest Communicator Pillows

"Don't take this the wrong way, but your sweaty hand is grossing me out."

"Not right now, Honey. Daddy’s ignoring you."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"That's our house, that's Mommy going to work, and that's you, staring out the window, wondering where it all went wrong."

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

Words of Love

"Hire me and I'll bring in orders. Big orders. You're gonna need a bigger door."

"Those are wonderful insights jack but we're, Looking for actual ideas."

"Remember, Mort: Courage isn't the absence of fear. Courage is remaining media-savvy in the face of fear!"

"I pick up on people's pain, Alexander. What's wrong?"

By teaching the parrot a few key phrases, Marilyn no longer needs to nag her kids.

"Don't judge me until you've walked a mile on my medication."

"We'll less than two metres again, don't know where, don't know when..."

"Can you teach me to really bark? I only seem to be able to yap..."

'Of course, this social contract will have to remain hypothical until someone invents writing.'

We can do ANYTHING if we all work TOGETHER.

'Does this outfit make me look fat?'

"That's Eleanor. She's a fact checker."

"Your free-floating anxiety is floating over to me."

'At least he's honest.'

'I always ask that you be frank and let your hair down providing, of course, you ever grow any hair to let down.'

'I'm NOT being a tattle-tale! -- I'm being a reliable source!'

'The 'whole truth and nothing but the truth' can be tricky.'

'According to the blood tests, x-rays and EKG... You're fat.'

"I've found my voice, Penny. It's deep, wise, and compassionate."

"It pains me to tell you this, but it ain't broke."

'You appear to be a very honest and ethical applicant. Are you sure you're in the right office?'

"To be honest we can't afford to be honest."

Augmented reality check

Do I really offend people all the time? You're too honest. People are different from other animals. Other animals like the truth, but people are very touchy. They like their information sugar-coated. Do you see? But what about Dr. Phil? Precisely. He's almost certainly part jungle creature.

'Why honest is the best policy...'

If a tweet is sent out and no one signs up to read it, does it exist? Happens millions of times a day.

“He’s my son, yes. But we only met a few times. Frankly, I hardly know him.”

Introducing Honest Abe Cards