Homegrown Food Experimenters Pillows

'Honey, do we have a problem with mold in our house?'

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

"It's a recipe called no-cook fish chowder."

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

Ten out of ten for effort...

"I think the 'Exotic Recipe' diet will make me lose weight. I'm running all over town trying to find the ingredients!"

'Something new for Sunday lunch today - Corned-beef sandwiches!'

Junior Masterchef - "Darren Smith and I'll be cooking chicken nuggets with Mars bars in a CocaCola sauce"

'No creamed peas for me today!'

'Wait, wait, before you mix them, you have to say, 'Pow!'.'

Funky Chef 2

"You sure you don't want any Pi?"

When placed in the hands of the right person on a long vacation, even egg salad could be a deadly weapon.

"It's a recipe from the 'Anti-Christ' cookbook."

"Just remember...the main ingredient in all my dishes is love."

'All our family's creativity is channelled into finding ways to gain weight.

"You were supposed to have invented fire!"

"The toaster is broken again, sweetheart."

One reason secret family recipes are usually best kept secret.

Dinner Cereal, Corn Flakes with Spaghetti Sauce.

Christmas was the one time of year when Roger could take advantage of working in the genetic research laboratory.

"Let me show you my latest D.I.Y. project."

'Uh yeah, it's supposed to be like that... it's a... it's a new invention.'

April 12,1989: The last day Ryan ever ate pancakes. 'I ran out of pancake mix so I fried up patties of my facial cream.'

New From The People Who Brought You I-Can't-Believe-It's-Not-A-Petroleum-By-Product Sandwich Spread

"First, break the egg...."

'How did you get your pastry so thin?' Steam roller.

'What kind of idiot orders a triple anchovy pizza with no cheese?'

'If only you would let me cover this Tofu-vegetables stuff with ketchup, it would at least LOOK like real food...'