Homebound Divers Gifts

The honeymoon was great. We never left the hotel room.

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

'The Questioner'

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

'He takes bathtime seriously.'

"Get another opinion if you wish, Mr. Von Flip...But I'm confident it will still come up ' heads - we operate.'"

"Alright be cool. We're just gonna ask for an autograph and be on our way."

Suitcase stickers say 'Nowhere'.

"Gotta cut back on my binge thinking."

"The cultural appropriation is annoying but the herring is delicious."

'I keep having this recurring nightmare, that when I get back from walking in the woods my porridge is too cold.'

Question Mark

Colay's glass bottom boat tours!

Angst - Zeitgeist.

'One of them's his air, the other one's his mp3 player.'

He was forced to take early retirement.

"Sorry, water in my ears! What was that?...sharp?...spark?"

'Mum, why are we called seagulls?'

'I will only need to talk to you in order to contradict what you've said.'

Deep sea diver finds The Plug.

I didn't realize we were on spring break this week.

Teaching from Home

"The only problem I have with my belief system is that I always believe it."

'It's alright for you - you're going home today!'

"He's a very sound sleeper. When he sleeps he makes all kinds of sounds!"

"Now remember if we do meet a shark, a sharp rap on his nose....

Man claims to be a good swimmer so lady asks him to jump in the river and fetch a flower

Information. If you can't put toothpaste back in the tube, how did it get there in the first place?

'Because it's here and not 29,000 sodding feet up in the Himalayas, that's why!'

'Not very big is it?' - 'No, but it's 85 feet deep.'

'You have cabin fever, don't you?'

"See – they named a word after us: phlegmatic."

'I distinctly remember telling you to wear 'sensible flippers'!'

'Oh, sure... Now someone shows up!'