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'Watching a lot of reality shows doesn't make you a realist!'

"I didn't spark joy."

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

“I’m stayin’ home — I want the world to know — I pro-bab-ly won’t go!”

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

"In da house"

'Does this outfit make me look fat?'

"That's Eleanor. She's a fact checker."

Living together, couple in love.

'At least he's honest.'

"Again, I must remind the witness that he is under oath!"

'Oh, this is my son - I'm home-enlightening him.'

'I always ask that you be frank and let your hair down providing, of course, you ever grow any hair to let down.'

'The 'whole truth and nothing but the truth' can be tricky.'

"So, you're staying in then?"

"Clinton spoke at my inauguration, and it's so cold outside-can he crash here for another week?"

"It pains me to tell you this, but it ain't broke."

'My new year's resolution is to stay home next new year's eve.'

Day 4 of self-isolation and the strain was showing.

Truth, Justice, Equal Time.

COVID-19 dime

Introducing Honest Abe Cards

'Why honest is the best policy...'

'Look, they're slowing down.'

'It's a prize for being first to go home.'

Real Estate Life

"To be honest we can't afford to be honest."

'What does my dad do? Anything Mum tells him.'

Do I really offend people all the time? You're too honest. People are different from other animals. Other animals like the truth, but people are very touchy. They like their information sugar-coated. Do you see? But what about Dr. Phil? Precisely. He's almost certainly part jungle creature.

Yes. This is definitely a house. The Housing Authority closes another tough case.

Americans More Optimistic

'He's building a yacht in his basement.'

"Nice, but it's still a fish bowl. We'd like something with a little more privacy."