Home Repair Enthusiast Gifts

Man falls through ceiling - 'Did you find the leak?'

"Yes, Mr. Willis, it's definitely rising damp."

'What do you mean, 'you can't fit me in until next month'?... This is your house!'

'So what did the Plumber think of your suggestions dear...?'

Man to dog with toilet plunger on face: 'I told you to leave the plumber alone.'

"Well, the water company said we were due a rebate"

'So, what part of the house are we delivering shock and awe to this weekend?'

'Don't worry, dear. I can see the plumber now. He's just getting out of his, Rolls Royce.'

"And this is an estimate of the estimate"

"It's times like this I wish I was ore than just an armchair plumber."

"Sean's do-it-yourself repairs afford us a night out...usually in the emergency room."

"The blow drier is broken."

"So a plumber charges $600 for 45 minutes' work?! Is that the coolest job or what?!"

"Honey? You'd better get home. The toilet's backed up again."

"I think the garage door opener might need batteries."

'The trick is hitting the right nail.'

"You can replace the tank, switch to natural gas, or huddle in a corner and cry as you ask yourself why you ever thought buying a house was a good idea."

"That 'Local Hero' Plummer you called must've been a super hero with the power of invisibility, 'cause he didn't show up!"

'I'm in the right road. What number did you say it was?'

'$47.50 to find out it wasn't plugged in!!'

Stupid sink was still clogged. Now she'd either have to call a plumber or swallow what was left of the drain cleaner.

'Fortunately it's the hot water pipe - it will save you having to wash your feet to-night.'

"Was it a fuse?"

'And have you reported the dampness in your home?'

"The plumber asked us to bring the leaking tap around to his office... he's too busy to make house calls."

'When you're done fixing the furnace, could you gather up these Demons From Hell that escaped?'

"But we make a killing on auto repairs...if we encourage people to fix things themselves first."

I'd like to help, ma'am, but your dishwasher came with a "do not resuscitate" order.

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

A DIY disaster.

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner