Home Networker Gifts

"Don't even pretend the two of you aren't stealing my wifi!"

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

Good Luck!

Writer Services: We fix plot holes.

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

"Sinclair's not all he's cracked up to be. His reputation exceeds him."

'Hey dude, just got the SMS of the Wild...'

Follow me on Twitter...

'We can't find a pond small enough where you'd be a big fish.'

'I'm not very good at mingling.'

"Deleted, I'm sure."

'Thanks for the order, Mr Barnes and I want you to think of me as your friend.'

"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."

"Your CV is amazing. The boss would love you. So unfortunately you've been unsuccessful in your application."

Base camp for Ed and Janet Wilson's courageous attempt to scale Mt. Blended Family.

"He's networking again!"

"You're the perfect candidate! Unfortunately, we aren't looking for perfect candidates at this time."

David Cameron: 'Is there a volunteer in the house?'

Gracebook.

'For more details or to comment, please visit my faithbook page.'

'Your resume says you are an S.O.B. tell me more about that.'

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

Did you get my "friend request"?

'Clothes-dryer Messiah.'

'Fantastic meeting! . . . Just fantastic. Why don't I have my weasels call your weasels.'

"Not many here - but he was very popular on social media."

Business Networking Session: 'Sorry I'm late - I'll just log on...'

"It's too easy to lose a business card. A rubber stamp, you'll remember."

"Thanks to separations, divorces and remarriages, I've got 20 grandparents."

'I hate networking.'

'You don't have to say hello every time we pass.'

"I'm sorry, Ms. Farkas can't see you right now. Can you come back when you're more important?"

"So, other than 224 facebook 'likes', do you have any other references?"

"Two heads are better than one, unless they're part of some sort of grizzly experiment."

'That's it Ma'am: Your VCR is set and programmed... You don't need to be an Alpha Male to work it out...'