Home Inventions Gifts

The Guy Who Invented An Alcohol Substitute

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

"I don't know, kids. I've been a stay-at-home dad for so long it just sort of... happened."

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

"Drunk, yet orderly"

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"Dad! Dad! It's freezing out here! I wish we had a fireplace to get all cozy and roast marshmallows!"

'Your CV says in your last job you were responsible for...'

"You'll love this model, sir! You won't have to miss any of the sports action when you go for a beer!"

'I'm a do-it-yourselfer, but I've never been a done-it-yourselfer...'

"And it comes with a coin filter for when you vacuum under the cushions."

"I sense a lot more going on with you than 'house-husband."

Woman knitting a washing line.

'Occupation? You name it, that's ME.'

Man's best friend

Linda discovers she had just baked the wrong ziti

"This new dough-maker attachment is going to pay for itself in no time.'

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

'My mom bakes from scratch -- she's a full-service mom.'

"The door-to-door sales rep was very persuasive, but in my defense he only sold me one."

'He'll do the dishes now that I've attached an accelerator.'

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

Bread maker, coffee maker, tea maker, pasta maker.

"Does it come with magnets?"

"Well, dear, you can quit worrying about our roof!"

"The horse is nice, but we could really use the blender."

"Iron Man! Thank heaven you’ve come!"

"Norman's building a small Hadron Collider."

"I made it myself. It's a lava lamp."

"When are you going to make the sort of bread my mother makes?"

Motatsu didn't want the guys to know that his wife made the shrunken heads by using a really hot dryer.

"The washing machine is very energy efficient. I just wish Frank was!"