Home Hygiene Enthusiasts Pillows

'Wash your hands, eat your peas, go to bed... there's too much regulation!'

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

"My dang neck is killin' me again." "That's because you left your dang hanger in your coat. Again."

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

'But you said to clean my room.'

Wash your hands

"So kids, you got work from your teachers right?"

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

"I'm guessing you're a germaphobe?"

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

Soap Versus Coronavirus

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

Hand Sanitiser on the Bar

'Mom, why do I have to wash both hands? I only eat with one of them.'

Cinderella mopping up

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

Criminal Germs

I think these suits have feet in them so we won't leave prints

'You've kept your shoes and socks on. I washed my feet yesterday.'

A day in the life of a dish sink

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

'Are you sure you washed this salad?'

'Is it ok if I just bring in some of our carpet?'

'I already had one bath today! You want my skin to wear out?'

"I don't want you swimming in the ocean -- it's a toilet that hasn't been flushed in 4 billion years."

Please Don't Wash Your Hands While Driving

"Yes, I have allergies! Hundreds! Because my crazy mother kept me in a germ-free house with no pets and I developed zero immunities!"

'I'm the good witch, and this is my house - made entirely out of dental care products.'

'I'm playing a crowd member in the Easter pageant. I was going to play Pilate 'til I found out I'd have to wash my hands.'

"Our staff here at the practice believe in 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration, so I had these showers installed."

"We might be in trouble – the environment people have cited us as a hazardous waste site."