Home Harmony Lover Gifts

Feng Shui Channel

Musical Accompaniment to Household Chores.

"I always thought of my childhood home as being larger."

A woman playing a keyboard

'Davinia! Your Feng Shui person's here.'

Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? My wife doesn't have a job. The other night she told me it'd be nice if I helped out a little more at home. So I replied "hey, I don't ask you to come to my place of business and do my job for me." I see. Have you tried the "act like I never said it and wait for her to forget it" routine? Yes, sir. I also, tried the "don't-make-eye-contact-until-she-forgets-it" maneuver. I'm running out of ideas.

"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."

Separation Anxiety

'Not bad. Already 17 minutes into Saturday morning before I receive my first ultimatum.'

"I'm going to be vacuuming, if you want to go into the farthest room and start asking me questions."

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 1

"I wish you'd get more in touch with your masculine side, Robert"

A woman's work is never done!

Barber shop quartet

Wishing you a very harmonious Christmas

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

"I know it's 3 a.m. but don't you think this is a good time to discuss spending the holidays with my mother."

"Despite my best efforts, you're still the man and I'm still the woman."

"I hardly think you can call waiting for updates to install doing nothing!!"

"Painted like this, finding furniture to match at least one colour should be simple!"

"It's your turn to throw out the dishes."

'You're always taking the fun out of everything!'

'Oh, yes, you will get off!'

The Cricket on the Hearth - Title-page to the first edition

String Quartet

Magic Carpet Cleaning

'My Graham is very house-proud.'

Looks like I do dishes again.

Blanket Pull

'No madam, the seat does not keep falling down, to the annoyance of male users, would you like one that does?'

"I apologize for the mess."

Theirs and Theirs

"You go right on snoring, doesn’t bother me one bit. Your snores are beautiful, do you know that? I love snoring…not like some people."

"Honey, please! I can’t concentrate with you in there being married to me!"

'Wait, put that back where it was. Let's see how the scratching post looks in this corner.'