Home-curious Parent Gifts

"We homeschool."

"If oceans are absorbing more carbon dioxide, why isn't this water fizzy?"

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

' ... and this is the half bath.'

'It started out as just a little knot on the floor,'

What can I play?

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

'It's nice to go hiking together. It gives us a chance to compare notes and figure out what the kids are plotting!'

"To keep warm in winter you're looking at a new central heating system costing £20,000."

Homeschooling

'This place is rather unusually located. Do you folks like sunsets?'

'We live in a designer trainer.'

Fireplace Projector.

'Brew?'

Carpet salesman, "There's a bit of tyre damage, but not so anyone would notice."

"It's got everything: northern exposure, hardwood floors, central tree."

'And if you run out of macaroni Cheerios!!'

Coming Soon: Haunted Homes on 60-foot lots.

"Yes, I appreciate that it's a converted fire station. But I still think I'd prefer stairs."

'Oh, it's perfect, George! And it has termites, too!'

'If you shoot your foot off don't coming running to me.'

"The one's an en suite and the other's a walk-in wardrobe."

"Interesting story behind this one..."

"Can I suggest a hoarder's house? It's perfect for a young family of rats to move in and share with the current owner..."

Homes of the font designers

'It's no spelling mistake-the dining room is in the basement.'

"When you said you lived in a fishbowl, I just assumed you never got out."

"I bought a new summer condo."

"My mom says you can sleep on the top bunk if your parents will sign a release form."

'Did you mess with the thermostat again?'

"Careful in the bathroom—we just had it reimagined."

Repossessed Properties.

"It has some charming original features."