Home Classroom Commanders Gifts

"What is the battle cry for homeschoolers?" Kids: "Go Home!"

A Puppet Named Juan

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

The full moon frenzy strikes again."

'The reason the core curriculum seems so ambiguous is that we dot really have a core curriculum.'

"I can't tell you how it ended. That would ruin the sequel."

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

'Actually, nowadays it's considered offensive to call an answer 'wrong'.'

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

Teacher's pet dog

Education Guidance

Too much homework: kid with two backpacks.

'Well, when you mess up on the job, you know where you stand with me.'

'You can't blame the kids for being restless when we have math teachers teaching French, and English teachers teaching science.'

Luck is when good classroom management skills meets a day when distruptice students are absent.

"It works as long as the teacher doesn't call on you."

"Tell me again how many young minds I will have shaped by the end of my teaching career."

I'm in the den mom, reading the newspaper for social studies class.

'That's the bell for round two.'

"Darren Eggleston. I saw that!"

'I give the same advice to all new teachers. Pretend you know what you are doing.'

'I know I can train them to be thoughtful productive citizens if I can ever get past sit.'

The Ideal Teacher.

"And if you look to the right you'll see what happens if you disrupt my class."

'It has cut down on note-passing, glancing at fellow students' test papers and spitballs.'

"I try to get a head start on them."

'Parents have been complaining that I'm too strict? You want me to be a little less intimidating? Do you want me to send students to your office 47 times a day? I'm a 67-year-old woman dealing with 16-year-old thugs....

"I said 'I quit'. Nobody listens to me any more."

'Teachers' Dreams.''Did you just say F***? Care to repeat it so everyone can hear you or is even a four letter word beyond your abilities? ... And the state expects me to make you multisyllabic.'

"Thanks for substituting. I left you some private notes in cursive."

"May I have your attention please???" "NO!!!"

'I find the best way to stop students from always talking to each other in class, is to keep asking questions. Then they have nothing to say.'