Home Appliance Expert Gifts

'I think I've found our overload.'

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

"No, our home wasn't stolen. Since it's a 'smart home', it keeps having itself moved to a nice neighborhood."

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

"Do you want to suddenly decide we need a waffle maker?"

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'Does this thing get channel four.'

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

"You'll love this model, sir! You won't have to miss any of the sports action when you go for a beer!"

"Sorry? I wasn't listening."

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

"Wow! The big guy! And what kind of B.T.U.s am I looking at here?"

Entertainment systems

"The door-to-door sales rep was very persuasive, but in my defense he only sold me one."

Linda discovers she had just baked the wrong ziti

"This new dough-maker attachment is going to pay for itself in no time.'

"My compliments to the can opener."

'And the funniest part is I made Frank go out and buy a new, $5,000 fridge, just to hold a $4.00 bottle of wine!'

"It says it can be assembled by a 5 year old child - pop out and find me one..."

'Drat - the water purifier is on backwards.'

Microwave. Do you have any idea of the time pressure I'm under?

"To toast!"

"Does it come with magnets?"

"I was supposed to rinse them first? So, you're telling me somebody designed a machine to wash dishes, but we're supposed to make sure we wash the dishes before we put them in the machine?"

Bread maker, coffee maker, tea maker, pasta maker.

"I'm a home-tech specialist. Your daughter called us. I'm here to convert her doll house into a smart doll house."

Castle drawbridge opens to reveal a dishwasher

Bathing and Showering.

"That is why you don't put 'instant rice' in a slow cooker."

'I was walking past the washers and dryers and one of my socks disappeared.'