Holiday Sale Strategist Pillows

"OK...now they've gone too far! We're barely out of Halloween!"

Cut Price

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Mighty Man Of Justice Goes Christmas Shopping Part 1

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

Orderly Conduct of Sales

"Sponsoring Christmas this year was an act of sheer marketing genius."

"Let's say an immediate $10.00 allowance increase plus an annual 8% cost of living raise and I'll call him off."

Giant Sale!

'Since you only work one night a year, it will take centuries to build up your retirement account.'

Buy One Get One Free Sign Outside Shoe Shop

Woman crushed under satin sheets.

"I'll see your two and raise you three."

'Ahh...I see you travelling far and wide on a long fruitless mission but you still can't find a town centre parking space this Christmas...'

"Did no one tell you that at this time of year everybody flies south?"

"I'm looking for something that the recipient will be too embarrassed to regift."

'Sure, I'll take a meeting - but only if you've been very, very good,'

'Shove' (at big sale).

Clothes sale - everything must go!

Sale today - 50% off everything!

"How can I word this Christmas card to my boss without wishing him a merry Christmas?"

"I'm going to need to make multiple stops."

'We're looking for a sales manager that can take our sales momentum, during December and January, and carry it over for the year.'

'I hate when they do this.'

Christmas escape plan

Sale! Everything Reduced!

"I'm not sure she really liked our gift. She used just two exclamation points after 'Thanks'."

'Does Santa have skype?. . . I'd like to get in some face time, so he puts me at the top of his list come December. . .'

'I braved the Boxing Day sales just for you, dear.'

All Our Furniture Genuinely Reduced!!!!

Turkey tries using a trick t-shirt to avoid being selected for dinner.