Holiday Shopping Strategists Pillows

"Making purchases with credit cards should have a five day waiting period!"

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Mighty Man Of Justice Goes Christmas Shopping Part 1

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

"No, we can't get you a new toy every time we go shopping."

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

"I'll throw in a few extra pinstripes."

"Let's say an immediate $10.00 allowance increase plus an annual 8% cost of living raise and I'll call him off."

'I've got it written down...'

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

Cars follow the sign to the mall rather than the sign to the manger.

"How will you be paying? Crypto, Venmo, electronic fund transfer, credit card, check, cash, precious metals, brightly colored shells or livestock?"

"Eeny, meeny, miney, mo.."

"I have no idea where we parked the car, or why we exist."

'Ahh...I see you travelling far and wide on a long fruitless mission but you still can't find a town centre parking space this Christmas...'

"Class, welcome back Sean ... who, you may recall, was lost for eight days in Home Depot."

'But what do you sell?'

'When it comes to shopping, not only does the buck stop here, but so do the fives, tens, twenties, fifties and hundreds.'

Black Friday

'And this one is just today's grocery list from my wife.'

"Why is this cart so heavy?"

'Our definition of a 'bargain' is right there in the small print.'

'Our survey shows there's more confidence in shopping coupons than in the dollar...'

'Sure, I'll take a meeting - but only if you've been very, very good,'

Seasonal shopping.

"I am in training for the sales."

"...And don't forget to include the receipts!"

"OK...now they've gone too far! We're barely out of Halloween!"

'I'm sure I've forgotten something. I got change from a fifty.'