Holiday Hilarity Fans Pillows

"OMG! They're eating noses!"

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Elfie Stick

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

Piranhaclaus

Tourists and their Pets.

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

Try me/try me/try me...

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

'Dang, again we're going so fast that we caused a disruption in the time-space continuum.'

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

"I could get used to working remotely."

'Looks like no Christmas bonus this year.'

'He's got your nose.'

"Then you just run a VLOOKUP against the Naughty column."

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

Christmas on Other Planets.

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

A centipede's Christmas stockings

'One of my relatives is coming to Thanksgiving dinner...and one of yours.'

"Hi, my name is Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "And I have a drinking problem." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph."

A few post-Christmas options for Santa.

"We don't use good and bad lists anymore. Now we have stupid, really stupid and completely nuts lists."

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

"I've made a terrible mistake."

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

The Reindeer Strike

'Leave the Iranian airspace at once!'

'HO,HO,HO,WHY ARE YOU AFRAID OF SANTA CLAUS??!!'

'After you ask him for the pony, ask him to pay for your college education.'

"Dear Santa, This Christmas please send clothes for all those poor naked girls on daddy's computer. Love, Veronica"