Hockey Hooligan Pillows

Ice hockey player with testicles on his stick.

"No more hockey for you, mister, until you learn to control yourself!"

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

"...And don't give me that 'I hope his precious little Blackhawks lose' look either!"

'...According to the survey, Canadians prefer the doggie style positions, so the can both keep watching the Hockey game...'

Yep the kids are loving the hotel they've made lots of new friends.

Curling Rocks!

Millwall - Hard Hat Area.

'Where the Deer and the Antelope play and veterinary dental bills are high.'

'He's got one more minute alone in the penalty box with my mother.'

'If we had any guts we'd get out of here!'

'Big turnover at center ice! Mmm...looks delicious.'

"What is it about an unfavorable soccer outcome that makes me want to wreak immediate havoc in the streets?"

'The defense rests.'

"Hold on, the puck is coming this way."

Footballer Sponsored By Brown Beer Has Brown Beer Can Thrown at Him

His Other Shtick

'Well, it's a boy. And I think I can explain those sudden sharp pains in your rib cage.'

'He's an experienced golfer! Experienced in sand traps, water hazards and slicing.'

'Hello, 911?'

Hooligans at Home

Hold it! I dropped a contact lens.

"Very interesting. But nowhere in your rhetoric was there a clue as to when we'll see the return of the NHL!"

"Hang on, Mother. The paramedics are on the way. I'll be right back—just going to check the score of the Blackhawks game."

"This is absurd!" "This is incredible!"

Practicing Defensive Medicine

'Bad sport.'

"Until you complete your training, you'll have to be content with just knocking a few teeth out."

Dog collars.

'Soccer hooligans, majesty! Thousands of them! We're doomed!'