Hitting Coach Pillows

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

I like the Jets...I guess

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

Reach for the Star.

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

The trauma of losing.

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

"I AM at my usual position."

Go! Means NOW!

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

Time Is Money

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

A married couple share the same pole vault.

Bears

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"