History Fan Gifts

'Is it organic?'

Turkey: The Gordian Knot

The Conservatives will be pulling the strings...

'It's nice now, but the trade surplus can't last FOREVER!'

"No Adam, I don't want to see your scar!"

King Arthur watching the Lady of the Lake impale a passing duck.

"That isn't allowed either."

Easter Island Pint

Moses did not always appreciate the young Hebrew's slang.

"Humans are so strange Dad: they discover us in America but call us 'Turkey'..."

"Turn back. The K27 has been superseded by the bigger, faster and more heavily armed K28."

"This may be the night he asks me... I saw him looking at engagement clubs today."

"It appears the ark was designed with no bathroom."

"Lord, save my ass from this Russia debacle, please!"

Would the last person fired from the White House please turn out the lights.

Dmitri Ivanovich Mendeleev: "At the...conference, four of my colleagues were standing side by side. Kiosk weighed 140 pounds..."

A caveman eats out.

The Race to Ukraine

"In the olden days, people used payphones. Beats me how they took selfies!"

Queen waving to crowd with mechanical arm.

"Honest man? No, I'm looking for a place to charge my phone."

God and the Devil play poker

At the Lost Gods Home

"Without further ado, please welcome the real 'Indiana Jones!'"

"So you can see our problem, King Midas, everything you touch turns to gold and that lowers the value of gold in the world market!"

Maypole

A horse driving a Model T tows an Amish buggy.

Samuel Pepys' writer's block

"Did we get the line item veto?"

Midas in plague times

Professor Ernie's history of philosophy. Rene Descartes had a difficult childhood. I think, therefore I am! I know you are, but what am I?!

Failed first careers: Sigmund Freud. Vienna Advertising Agency. We're going to have to let you go, Freud. You just don't know what women want.

'I'm not a virgin - if it helps.'

'If you really cared about me, you'll swim back to the boat and get my car keys.'

'I fully support your goals, but I can't condone your methods.'