Highland Hiker Gifts

"I don't remember it ever being this windy before."

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 9.

Fly Fishing

'A sitcom has to be quirky or formulaic. There is no middle way.'

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

Sport Utility Boot.

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

Camping.

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"The only problem with living at the top of a mountain is the constant stream of people coming to ask stupid questions."

"Yaffle Pass Elevation 11,990 ft Continental Divide"

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"I love the things I say when I’m in nature."

'Hello there, how y'doin'?'

"When are you gonna roll in something?"

"Well, it might not work but at least it smells bad."

"Don't you want to hear about the day I had?"

"Hey guys - wrote a new song! It's called 'I suggested Paris.' And a' one, two three..."

“Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!?”

'Bob, wait!!! Nice try, bear.'

Mountain climbers, "Someone's been here before us."

"Daisy, that fall broke my leg pretty badly. You need to go get help, girl - oh, what a big stretch! Who’s a good stretcher? Daisy’s a good stretcher! What a good girl…"

Scotsman in the bath...

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

"It's the adorable snowman!"

"Just lemme finish my coffee."

'I wouldn't bother. They're probably gluten-free vegetarians.'

"Hungry? I'm ravenous, Norman, I could murder a lentil cutlet."

Bear Signpost.

Large bird chases bird watcher up a hill.

"You've got a friend in me."

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

"Stop whimpering. Most dogs would kill for a walk like this."

Guru. It's not some kind of zen metaphor --- I really do have an invisible fence!