Higher Learning Enthusiast Gifts

Proctor addressing a university student

"I see here that you are a recent graduate."

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

I will study my speling words...

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

Scarcity

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

U of Debt

My book report is based on the audio book of the same name.

How to deliver a successful presentation.

'Simpson! Stop causing low-level disruption in class now!'

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

'Recalculating...recalculating...'

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

"I guess it took a pandemic to make me realize school is better than trying to learn stuff online."

How come rich kids do so well on SAT tests? Their parents give them books, fancy trips, lessons and

Lessons in Prehistory.

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

All Harold's aptitude test showed is that he had an aptitude for taking tests.

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

"I used to be your old school teacher, I always said you would amount to nothing."

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

A Preschool of Fish

"This is not the first time I have been asked to speak."

Congratulations! All that cramming paid off.

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."