High-society Mocker Gifts

Gala Benefit

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

'Your fur looks like you slept in it.'

"'Mr. Evans,' she said to me with that adorable smile, 'I think you're the nicest boy in the entire old-boy network.'"

"We're going to build in Rhinebeck, once Steven finds the right brick."

"Even my chauffeur has a chauffeur."

The Ladies Who Lurch.

"Pat's independently wealthy and dependably entertaining."

Hoodies anticipate bride's choice of wedding dress.

The Nihilist Deli.

"The beatings will continue until the morale improves!"

'Are you sure it's non-drowsy? I cannot afford to oversleep...'

Bottle Opener Strikes A Red Wine Well

"It tastes and smells just like a glass of wine!"

"Well, I guess that old saying really is true: the squeaky wheel gets the grease!"

"Imogene is just back from an extended trip through the Navajo country."

"..and this is where his lordship holds his balls and dances."

Earplugs £2 a Pair

"Check it out, guys. Finally got my wine legs!"

'Ever since she has found out that she is related to one of the Queen's corgis she has been unbearable.'

"I love the four seasons, .. Manhattan, Palm Beach, Paris and Martha's vineyard."

Members only.

'Hugo has short term memory loss but we've chosen to ignore it!'

"Keep pushing - I can see the baby's head!"

"Regift the bicycle, Charles, but put this in my Panama pile."

'During our vacations in Aspen, Cecil, did we hobnob with the rich or super rich?'

'The cross doesn't affect him. Let's try with a Star of David.'

"So help me, Henderson, if you sing 'Row Row Row Your Boat' one more time..."

Sloane Ranger.

Posh store has sign: When Flaunting Is Not Enough.

Ladies' Mile

'Hmm...needs refining.'

Freak Show

Butler takes salmon from the family for the servants to eat

'When you've seen one criminally violent, sex-filed horror play, you've seen the lot, I always say.'