High Seas Humorist Gifts

"Damn it, Ned. You're steering us in circles again."

'I'm not sure what country he's representing, but he seems a real natural!'

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

'Luxury cruise you said!'

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

Japanese Whaling

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

Shark food pyramid.

"Is a six pack enough? I can go back out."

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

Walking the Plank.

Man painting MOM on boat

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

'I'm not scaring the fish - I'm WARNING the fish!'

Raft with a 'Caution Wet!' sign.

Ocean Liners will be Ocean Liners

"You can find me on Inkedin."

'We're drifting apart.'

"Hey wader, there's a fly in my sloop"

"Nope, not a dock! Not a diving board! Guess again!"