High-flying Meal Creator T-Shirts

'Is it just me, or are her eating habits strange now that she's a flight attendant?'

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

'Mom! Dad's eating my science fair project!'

"I asked my mother to pack my parachute and she packed my lunch instead."

"Fresh pepper?"

"How did I find my lamb chop? Well, I lifted up a roast potato and there it was."

'Mom, I followed your time-honored legendary family recipe for Brussels Spout Bake with one exception - I substituted a pizza for the Brussels Sprouts.'

"Do you like eye of newt in your Mac 'n' Cheese?"

"How about supper in the tub tonight, Hon?"

I thought this year we'd do soup and salad.

'How's the steak, sir?'

"Peanut butter and jelly...simple...delicious... why didn't I think of that?"

'The Businessman's Lunch won't cut it, hon. We want the Businessman's Orgy!'

"That comes with some peanuts in a galosh."

"Ideally, you want the dough to rise to about thirty-five thousand feet."

'We're having leftover-a-la-king!'

"At this time, if everyone would please switch their palates to airplane mode."

Faith-Based Tuna Casserole

'Could you please do an dental x-ray? I think I broke a tooth on a rock in my in-flight meal.'

"Quick, get it while its molecules are still vibrating."

"Iron Chef, my ass!"

'Now I can see why our son's roommates won't let him cook.'

'You should have read the cookery book for teenagers. It's pretty short: 'Take the food off the package before you microwave it'.'

'There's a worm on my plate.' 'That's a sausage.'

"I found out that if you combine a PBJ with a BLT you get an UGH!"

"And for your dinner, sir, will it be 'Gourmet' or 'Bon Appetit'?"

"Now that everyone in New York eats at 6, we need to eat at 3."

'And bang a few pots around. I like to pretend you won't just pull it out of the freezer and throw it in the microwave.'

Hello Spell

'Now that you've taken a bite would you like to know what it is?'

"Open wide! Here comes the de Havilland Dash-8, twin-engine, medium range turbo prop airliner."