Hieroglyphs Decoder Pillows

"I'm not sure but I think it says, 'keep out!'"

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

Pyramid Handicap Parking

"Writer's block?"

"Is it (eye symbol) before (water symbol) or (water symbol) before (eye symbol)?"

"This is amazing! Roughly translated, it says 'King Tut was here o.k.'"

'This stuff is a snap for me. I used to be a pharmacist.'

'It appears to be a kosher for Passover recipe.'

'I know what you're thinking.'

"I can write, but I can't draw."

"Nice job, but there in the middle, I think you spelled Akhenaten wrong."

"I'm sorry. . . but I can't understand a symbol you're saying."

'Mena,the presses are about to roll.' 'But I'm STILL writing my column!!'

Egyptians discussing hieroglyphic spelling.

'Roughly translated it says 'Can't remember the code to get into your pyramid? Call Pharaoh Locksmithing.'

'It says I can't access Pharaoh's tablet unless I'm on his buddies list.'

'It says he put the 'Ram' in the 'Rama Lama Ding Dong'.'

'Will you guys be quiet? These walls are trying to tell me something!'

Hieroglyphic disco dancer

"I crawl that I may savor the richness and diversity of people and places along the way."

Lost to antiquity.

'Right there is where he departs from the script.'

"I can't take another memoir."

'It's this one here, that I don't understand.'

Ancient Egyptian Curser

"Oh yes, apparently this one is a copyright symbol."

'Don't be ridiculous, Schaumberg! -- They didn't have Burma-Shave back then!'

'Amazing what a little teamwork can accomplish.'

"This confirms that the Babylonians interfered with the Egyptian elections."

'Not THE Rosetta Stone?'

'It seems they couldn't decide if the new millennium begins at 3000 B.C. or 3001 B. C.'

'Remember my son, it's not who you are, but who I was that matters.'

An archaeologist sees an ancient Egyptian entrance to a subway.

'I can't believe this. . . 'There was a young man from Nantucket...'

"I'm going to refer you to an ankhologist."