Hibernate Aficionado Gifts

'My mother in law stayed with us over winter too, but in my case, like me, she slept the whole time...'

The Origami Society...

"It's such a beautiful day. Why don't we go out and get someone to eat?"

"When are they going to change the 'feature'?"

'Seriously Vicar, I do not think you have seen this guy in the morning service!'

Jack in the Box

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

'The good stuff is here, under the counter.'

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

Child buys 'Dracula doll': Keep in box until sunset.

"I like to come prepared for meetings."

"Me, I'm lazy, so I wouldn't seek an endless summer, but an endless winter. I so wish I could migrate to hibernate twice a year..."

"Call yourself a fortune teller? I've never even heard of the Cairo museum!"

'The only game my Dad knows is playing possum.'

'This is Citroen Picasso's cubist period.'

"I'm sorry, sir, but Professor Dornley does not wish to be distracted for the duration of the winter."

'How about that? -- Lady Godiva got a bouffant!'

Corpse Reviver Number 2

'Oh no! Political memoirs!'

"Shoot, I forgot this place has early checkout."

"It's half past November, young man! Get back in your room and hibernate!"

'Wait a minute, this guy is missing a head Oh jeez, we're totally gonna crash,'

"Let's dig into that. When did you first start feeling like you lost the will to not live?"

Someone has had a hard day!

'My doctor's put me on a strict diet. From now on I have to ask my victims how high their cholesterol is.'

I'm retired...I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today.

"Brrrr...! - You know when you get the feeling that someone's just fallen into your grave...?"

After-Life Mints

'Instead of one of our dishes you want to eat me? Just a minute, sir.. I've go to ask the manager.'

'No spring cleaning for me: I get a cleaner to come over in winter while we're asleep...'

"Hibernation is great son! We sleep through the dreary winters and wake up in the glorious springs!"

"It is too early to be hungry. Go to sleep and don't wake me up, at least until march."

'This isn't his nap. This is his pre-nap. Then comes his nap. Followed by his post-nap.'

William Tell's son wears hi-vis jacket and hard hat

"Are you listening to me?"