Herbal Blends Gifts

"Dear, you're drinking the potpourri."

Too much cilantro

Water the hydrangeas twice a week and trim as needed. The bromeliad only needs to be high-fived on Saturday, but you can give it high and low fives anytime you have a spare moment. Just, whatever you do, don't give it a "too slow" or it will turn inward and begin shutting down.

Medicinal plants

'I put the cake in the blender because I wanted a glass of cake.'

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Traditional vs alternative medicine.

"Before invasive species, the only things I could grow were weeds and mildew."

'My real name is Bellis Perennis, but you can call me Daisy!'

'Mom's Spa'

Plant Parenthood...

Florist "Say it with cacti"

"I've never seen Tia Carmen so excited about a grand opening."

"You can tell when people don't have pets, because they start to look like their plants."

'You use HERBS to help you levitate? - How does THAT work?'

Poinsettia

Modern Witch Shoppe

The eye of newt - Is it gluten-free?

'Yes, I love you, but my family would disown me if I cross-pollinated with a weed, so our relationship must end.'

'I wish to refer you to a tree surgeon. You have all the symptoms of Dutch Elm disease!'

Witch in drugstore: They're endangered now, so I need a newt substitute.'

'A large Swiss Pharmaceuticals company has expressed serious interest in my potion.'

'Thyme heals all wounds.'

'Take me to your weeder!'

'I told you I only cook with my mother's Italian spices. She just left Naples and should be here with them in about eight hours.'

"I'm not feeling well. I'm picking up a few things at my pharmacy."

Extreme Naturopathic Medicine.

"Aren't you getting a little carried away with this herbal medicine, Doctor?"

'St John's wort ambulance' - hippy ambulance.

Sheds

'What do you mean the FDA is going to start regulating the use of eyes of Newts?'

'I'm taking you off the herbal tea.'

"You just need a few sprigs to spice up your meal Sir..."

Gardeners

'Today's lecture is on Herbology... so without furthe ado, let me introduce Herb!'