Helmet-wrangling Humorist Pillows

A word from James Cameron. . .

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Fishing - No. VIII

"On your left."

"Yeah, uh, maybe you're not cut out to be the 'sparkly' kind of vampire."

"It makes sense when you see the second painting with the lego."

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

"Welcome to Trapeze Talent Inc. If you'd like us to catch you, fill out this form, and we'll get back to you if we're interested."

"While you were on vacation, Zooker, a motion was made and seconded to saw five and a half inches off your chair legs."

'If they don't laugh, we'll say it's art.'

"Hold on, one more thing to go."

'You shouldn't have forgotten the flag!'

Airport security - next step?

"I told you there's no 11th flooooor!"

"My records show we sent your bonus. Have you looked on your roof?"

Frisbee Flies By Mountain Climbers

'We operate on the point system here. When you see something go wrong, point at whoever you think is to blame.'

'A metal plate in your head does not qualify as a helmet.'

Gavel me once, shame on you; gavel me twice, shame on me.

'Have you heard about the origami shop?'

Make Your Own

"We've got to strike the setup. The patron wants organic."

'Except for that, how did the experimental plane perform?'

"Now that the kids and grandkids are grown I can get back to more erotic embroidery."

'Get on the field! Let's go! Get your heads in the game!!'

Bra falling from the sky.

mountain climer finding a guru wearing a covid mask and a sign that says 6 feet please.

"This guy's been acting kinda funny."

Olaf's Doughnut Hut. The real reason for viking helmets.

"For heaven’s sake, I said ‘fetch.’ Not ‘fly’!"

Airport. Taxi. Everybody I drive to the airport seems to lose their fear of flying.

'You want to get me the owner's manual out of the glove compartment?'

"We get your point about legroom, now please put them back in the cabin"

'I traded mine in for a bicycle helmet!'

"So I lost my bicycle helmet, what about it?"

"Everyone is wearing protective gear. How did they know you were playing today?"