Hell-bound Sprinter Gifts

Racing to Hell

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

'We are in a race against time and the auditors. Gentlemen...start your shredders!'

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

He won't stop talking about being the fastest ever. He's a broken record about breaking a record.

Runner's High, Runner's Low

“I’m not out of shape — I’m just not used to running so much.”

'The publisher wants to know how the article on the booming economy is coming along.'

Time Run

Cheetah in at the start of a race, thinking: 'Why do I have to keep proving myself?'

Pit Stop for Track and Field

"When it came to running, Kevin was second to none."

"Athlete? No. Ambulance chaser."

'No peeking!!' - Learn to Run Classes.

Office ready to leave at 5 o'clock.

"Shoot. I'm gonna be late to class again."

'Spinout!'

Devil skis down a volcano.

'No thanks: I'm more of a sprinter than a jogger...'

Professor Axxis feels naked jogging without his toupee.

Little girl running alongside athlete asking for autograph.

"Grandpa, have you ever run with the bulls on wall street?"

"Pierce and Pebble, Solicitors. Here's a writ for you to appear in court for harrassment of our client, Dr Faustus."

He was fast, but weak, and once again it would cost him the victory.

"Talk about pressure, they've already purchased the 'new & improved' labels."

"Are you sure you should be on this list?!"

'I can't find my keys!'

Huge, steroid taking sprinter.

'Stressed' Spelled Backwards is 'desserts'

A runner on an endless loop

'D'you want to see me run the 100 metres? ...D'you want to see it again?'

'She's in training for the Olympics. The 100 metre sprint to the checkout.'

Ophidiophobic Society 10k Run.

Man being prodded into hell by a demon meets a charity collector with clipboard, asking: 'Hello, could I have five minutes of your time?'

'Why do I have to keep proving myself?!'