Height Conscious Pillows

'I like you and all, it's just I usually don't date anyone shorter than me.'

'I wish you'd stop recounting boyhood stories with the phrase, 'Back when I was your height'.'

"I identify as six-two."

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

Welcome to Everest! No Loitering.

Wash your hands

Running

'Pumpkin pie isn't dessert. It's another vegetable.'

"I didn't ask to be made with seventeen grams of fat."

'My mother's resolution is to eat more vegetables, and my resolution is to help her by giving her mine.'

'I'm not feeling well. I think I've got human flu.'

"She was really disappointed when she found out she was going to an eye doctor and not an iDoctor."

Man on Stilts in a Market

'How many more times must I tell you to keep this door CLOSED, Hoskins?'

"I'm so confident that when I climb a ladder."

Increase Your Height.

"Scientists have found out that drinking alcohol can be dangerous...well, water can be dangerous, too!"

"I can't eat these nutrition bars. They're for women."

Son measuring his father against the wall.

'I havn't finished last years Marathon yet...'

"Spring is in the air but it's December in my ABS."

'Man, I hate it when she wears heels.'

Two men, one with his abdomen outside his trousers, the other with it inside. 'The Tummy Tuck.'

Tightrope Walker.

Stilts go to Bobo the Clown's head.

Tossing for it.

'Test results are back. Coffee, donuts, sleep deprivation. Doc, you've got to start taking better care of yourself.'

Man on stilts on a date.

"Was that the crack of dawn, Arthur, or your back?"

'At least my blood pressure is nice and low.'

"We're very green here, we recycle everything."

"Middle age is when you finally get your head together, but your body starts falling apart."

"We're seeing a lot of Selfie Face Syndrome lately."

'Be patriotic. Food prices are rising. Eat less.'