Height Conscious T-Shirts

'I like you and all, it's just I usually don't date anyone shorter than me.'

'I wish you'd stop recounting boyhood stories with the phrase, 'Back when I was your height'.'

"I identify as six-two."

I'm trying to read your test results from urology, but their server can only stream them a little bit at a time.

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

Welcome to Everest! No Loitering.

I have been working so hard I haven't gone to the gym in ages. You've been trying to make ends meet and forgot about the middle!

I'm not evolving - I just thought I should lower my salt intake.

Running

Wash your hands

'Pumpkin pie isn't dessert. It's another vegetable.'

"I didn't ask to be made with seventeen grams of fat."

'My mother's resolution is to eat more vegetables, and my resolution is to help her by giving her mine.'

"She was really disappointed when she found out she was going to an eye doctor and not an iDoctor."

'I'm not feeling well. I think I've got human flu.'

Man on Stilts in a Market

'How many more times must I tell you to keep this door CLOSED, Hoskins?'

"I'm so confident that when I climb a ladder."

"I can't eat these nutrition bars. They're for women."

Increase Your Height.

"Scientists have found out that drinking alcohol can be dangerous...well, water can be dangerous, too!"

Son measuring his father against the wall.

'I havn't finished last years Marathon yet...'

"Spring is in the air but it's December in my ABS."

I always feel so short when you wear heels.

'Man, I hate it when she wears heels.'

Two men, one with his abdomen outside his trousers, the other with it inside. 'The Tummy Tuck.'

Tightrope Walker.

Stilts go to Bobo the Clown's head.

Tossing for it.

'Test results are back. Coffee, donuts, sleep deprivation. Doc, you've got to start taking better care of yourself.'

"We're seeing a lot of Selfie Face Syndrome lately."

'Be patriotic. Food prices are rising. Eat less.'

"We're very green here, we recycle everything."

Man on stilts on a date.