Heavenly Hotline Lover Pillows

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

"How can you be out of wings?"

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

A woman playing a keyboard

"But what if this is all there is?"

'It's sad in a way -- just when he was declaring victory.'

God passing the time.

'So that's why I didn't get that train set? !'.

Doggie door in The Pearly Gates.

Angel Swing

The Assumption of Mary

"Cancel my landline...are you crazy?"

Angel sees FIRE EXIT sign on trap door in cloud.

'Now that's what I call a religious broadcast.'

"I volunteer for the Samaritans. I tried to phone in sick this morning but they talked me out of it."

The worship singer suspects someone doesn't appreciate his talent after finding his mic muted for the 3rd time.

Barber shop quartet

'The good news is you don't have to worry about cholesterol, carbs, or trans fat.'

String Quartet

An everything bagel? You call this an everything bagel?

Angel with a halo nose piercing.

We have some good news and we have some very good news!

'How nice! -- They're making a ten-part miniseries about the Bible!'

Just before The Big Bang

"I always wondered what it would be like to sleep on a cloud."

"I was lucky -- my parents went to Heaven."

"Wanna trade guys? My guy annoys me already. I like your guy."

'Hello?...Customer service?...Uhhh...How do you open the box?'

....Today the new economic forecasts get published...and that means we have to work overtime...sorry.

'Beer, wouldn't be heaven without it.'

'If you now feel like punching someone in the face. . . press five!'

Visual Gag / A man in Heaven replacing the AAA batteries for his halo

"He's very proud of his stomach's 'good bacteria'."

Heaven Has VIP