Heartache Healer T-Shirts

'So I gave him back the ring and tore up his picture. And I'm pouring out the '61 Chateau Margaux he gave me, too - but, you know, into a glass.'

'I had no idea aspirin came in such a large bottle.'

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

"Have you tried barking at the moon?"

"You won’t find a more effective antidepressant."

"Remember, the road to recovery begins with baby steps."

'Ignore them, Charlie. They're nothing but philistines. I liked your poetry, truly I did!'

"We can try and mend the damaged heart, but not a broken one."

"I pick up on people's pain, Alexander. What's wrong?"

"Can you recommend a nice red wine that goes well with a broken heart?"

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

"His wife and family will decide on the course of treatment, but, as his ex, feel free to open up a few old wounds."

'Do we have any oldies but goodies that you would care to hear?'

"Only time can heal a broken heart, Brenda, and fortunately I have the time, every Thursday at three o'clock."

"Preparing for another day nursing?"

'He's the star of a new medical series.'

Broken Heart

It would be so great if, just once, someone didn't waltz in here complaining about something. Emergency.

'Let me handle this. I'm an orthopedic specialist.'

'Don't take it the wrong way, we could always be friends'

"I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Here, try this."

'St John's wort ambulance' - hippy ambulance.

'I'm taking you off the herbal tea.'

"I'm afraid antibiotics aren't of much use for a broken heart!"

A woman repairs a broken heart.

"My super-vision sees...someone yelling at his elders...Cousin Cecilia sneaking out her window...someone making a spinach burrito... No! I must stay focused...and find the evil villain mal de ojo!"

Psychiatry visit.

'Another triple, Joe -I'm trying to forget several women.'

"And for that pain deep down in your soul, I'm going to prescribe the saxophone."

"I thought you said you were dating a rich doctor!"

"Lay off the natural remedies. You're beginning to ferment."

'That's Saint Throbbold. Patron saint of migraine.'

"Here, let me put some ointment on your bug bite. I made it myself from cayenne powder, licorice root and mugwort leaves blended with that vanilla pudding I made last week. Hmm...it's not here."

"So you're depressed by financial, sexual,political,religious and health issues....tell me about it..."

One line a day... Diary 2020