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Birthday Cakes for Dieters...

Bad for you but to die for

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

Better times ahead.

Well, you'd better learn to like them!

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

'My wife's on a diet. So far she's lost her personality.'

Midlife: You Are Here.

Wiseguys/Smartasses/Eggheads/Smarty Pants

"Eating a diet rich in vibrant colors does not mean a bowl of Skittles."

Doubt or Certainy

I can't decide what to read, Gourmet or Weight Watchers.

Adam and Eve - Food scares

Shrink

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

Adult Book Store. Leaving home. Finding a Job. Getting Married. Buying a House. Raising Kids. Living with Stress.

"I avoid the 3 'Bs' when I'm dieting - boxes, buckets and bags."

"You knew I was straight when you married me."

'It's quite common with men your age. You've got a silver duct tapeworm.'

'Don't worry. His diet's only last a day or two.'

Books or Junk Food.

Academy.

"Eating junk food may make you feel young at heart, but it isn't making your heart feel young."

Woman and scales.

'This is kind of a bad time - could we have an affair AFTER tax day'

'Have you been eating right?'

"Wait, I signed up for the traditional yoga class."

"Every time I go near the refrigerator, my fitness app somehow locks it. I think they're both conspiring against me."

'What you need is some negative growth.'

Low fat diets.

"What do you have that's rich in antioxidants?"

'Do you want a fright with that?'

"I'm starting a new diet today. Let's go out for ice cream to celebrate."