Healthcare Practitioner Gifts

Man walking past the offices of the medical practitioners needed throughout the course of life.

Doctor's Office. I don't know which I hate more to hear him say --- "Learn to live with it" or "Learn to live without it."

"Your wife says she's experiencing nausea. Could you leave the room?"

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

Man is stopped from entering doctor's surgery by a receptionist dressed as a bouncer.

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

Medical Building Directory: Dr. Larry Nix, Dr. Sally Putty, etc..

"Get me this...get me that...fluff my pillow...I don't feel well...if I wanted to listen to that all day, I wouldn't have left my husband!"

"The tests confirms you have short-term memory loss."

Physician tending a mummy.

Cardiac Recovery.

"The bottle says that 'Extreme Hair Growth' is a rare side effect of this medication."

"Hope you don't mind, but I can't find my little hammer."

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

'Maybe it is psychosomatic.'

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

"I won't stick my tongue out. You told me it was rude."

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

We saw this episode of Grey's Anatony, I recognize the symptoms.

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

'Your reflexes are still good!'

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

'My medical school believed laughter is the best medicine.