Healthcare Economist Pillows

'Of course, a full-body scan can be done more cheaply if you go through airport security.'

'How much medical skill are you willing to pay for?'

$10 a step at the doctor's office.

"We'd like to run some tests to help pay for our expensive new testing machine."

We charge $500 for every nook and $1,200 for every cranny during diagnosis.

"Your test results are back. We're going to have to remove your appendix and your wallet."

M.D. Here's a list of symptoms, conditions and treatments --- I'm sure we can find something to fit your budget.

"Says he can't afford the hospital's parking fees!"

"Yes, it is a very large bill. Unfortunately, the doctor who gave you a second opinion charges ten times what I do."

'Good news, Mr. Blume! Your condition isn't serious - just expensive.'

"Is the drug that you are prescribing available as a generic, so I can save some money, or at the very least, available from a pharmaceutical company that I own shares in, so that I can make some money?"

"We've combine the recovery area with the gift shop... just in case your visitors want to pick up a little souvenir."

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

Medical Equipment profit chart.

"Doc, my arm is killing me, but I don't know how I can afford care. My deductible is through the roof and I just got laid off my job."

Your position has been outsourced, Blue bottle...if you wish to continue working for us...may I suggest relocating and taking a 600 pay cut.

"The real question is whether health care is a basic human right or a bona-fide commercial opportunity."

Pay Hospital Bill Here.

'I decide reimbursement rates at the Healthcare Exchange of Oz!'

"No, I didn't say, 'health'. I said I'm concerned about your wealth... Can you afford to pay my bill?"

'You're suffering from a lack of profit-making opportunities within the NHS.'

Trumpcare is buried by the House and Senate while Obamacare remains alive.

Privatisation of the NHS

"Be patient, son. Dinner will be served shortly..."

"I'm sorry, Mr Percival, but what you've got is not economically treatable."

"Want me to send my nurse in here to tickle you? Laughter is the only medicine you can afford."

DOH should create a simple prevalence formula that works.

'There's only one side effect from this medication. It starts when you don't pay my bill!'

"Kids, your mother and I have spent so much money on health insurance this year that instead of vacation we're all going to go in for elective surgery."

Reforms need tweaking not abandoning.

"Thanks for curing my multiple personality disorder, Doc... How much do we owe you?"

"He's losing his will to pay!"

NHS financial abyss

'We want you to take power over your work, and this is how we want you to do it.'

'The government will continue to provide the full range of NHS services to anyone who needs them whenever they need them.'